Building your son’s confidence can be one of the most difficult tasks you face as a parent. It is known that by the time a child hits their school-age years, those lacking in self confidence will have a harder time making friends and trying new things. How can you build your son’s confidence? Try out some of the following suggestions:
Show your son that you believe in him. Help him uncover his talents and teach him how to build upon his talents.
Be sure to give your son praise and positive feedback. When your child fails at something, teach them how to pick themselves back up and try again.
Listen to your son. Far too often parents don’t set aside time to talk to their children and to listen to them. As your son grows and matures, he is more than likely to withdraw from his family as he is learning to deal with new emotions. Reassure your son that you are always there for him when he needs you.
Always acknowledge your son’s feelings. It is sometimes hard for boys to put into words how they are feeling. As a parent, it is your responsibility to help him properly convey his feelings, so they don’t turn into a negative behavior.
If you need to punish your son, always punish the behavior. You should never criticize your child by saying things like “what were you thinking?” “Are you just stupid?” This is very damaging to your son’s confidence and criticism like this will tell him he is a bad person. If this type of criticism goes on for a long time, it can be very damaging to your son’s self confidence. Always be clear to your son that it is the behavior you are upset with and not them as a person.
Find out what your son’s hobbies and interests are and try to share them with him. You may not always enjoy the things your son does, but by taking a genuine interest in his hobbies, you are showing your son you are listening and that you care.
Help your son with his fears and insecurities. School often brings out many fears in children. Some children may find math and science easy, while others find it extremely difficult. Support your son and encourage him, offer your help with his schoolwork or other problems he is facing.
Encourage your son to try new things. It may be hard to try something new, but your son will be rewarded for his efforts. Success in something new boosts self confidence.
Never belittle, condemn, or laugh at your son. Laugh with your son instead of at him as he may be hurt by your teasing.
If you warn your child about a particular decision before he makes it and he fails or is hurt, never say “I told you so”. This will only hinder your child’s self confidence to grow and will only make them feel worse for something they knew was wrong in the first place.
You should strive to have a positive self image. Your son looks to you as an example and for strength. If you have a negative self image, you are teaching him that you don’t like yourself and you don’t respect yourself. Children tend to copy their parent’s behavior and mimic their examples. You are the strongest influence on your son, be sure you are setting a good example.
Always think before you act. A thoughtless remark can severely damage your son’s self image and cause him to resent you for a long time. The last thing you want to do is make your son feel stupid or useless.