As a parent you have probably had your share of whiny kids, and you have probably had at least a time or two where the whining was so bad that it got on your nerves. If this has happened to you, don’t worry; you are not alone. Every parent has to deal with whiny children, although some kids are whinier than others, and every parent has reached their breaking point when it comes to their children whining. But what you as a parent might not be aware of is that whining is actually a learned behavior. It is not something that all children just do. They have seen it done somewhere, whether it is at home, school, the grocery store, or other numerous places. Children have witnessed that at times this behavior works; so they end up repeating the behavior, but the good news is that there is hope. Like every learned behavior, whining can be unlearned as long as you are consistent.
Here are some tips on how to make whining stop when it is getting on your nerves.
The first thing that you need to think about when whining is getting on your nerves is that no matter what age your child is, whining is completely normal behavior; granted some kids do whine more then others. But by knowing that whining does happen and expecting it to happen at some point, you are less likely going to be stressed out over the whining and will be able to deal with getting your child to stop whining faster and calmer than if you are at your breaking point.
Whatever you do, don’t yell at your child or tell them to stop whining; those tools never work and usually end up stressing you out even more and causing your child to whine or even cry louder than before. Nobody, including children, likes to be ordered around. Sure you are the boss, but there are other ways to go about stopping unwanted behavior. Barking orders and yelling are counterproductive to what you are trying to do. Instead of barking orders at your child, simply tell them what it is they are doing and how they can correct it. For example “That is whining, and whining doesn’t work with me. But what does work is using a nice normal tone of voice, and sometimes when you do that you will get what you want.”
Because children are going to whine, one of the best things you can do to help save your sanity is to provide them with a room where they can go to whine, such as a bedroom. Once you have sent them there, do not allow them to come out until they have stopped whining and can talk to you in a normal tone of voice. Surprisingly this method actually works rather quickly in getting them to stop whining for the moment. Not to mention the fact that this provides an area where they can continue to whine if they choose to, but you won’t have to hear them.
Another great idea for whining is to tell your child what kind of behavior you expect out of them. Good communication is especially important before you go to places that can cause a lot of whining. By talking to your child before you enter the place, you can prevent the whining before it stops and before it starts getting on your nerves.