Raising your son to be a responsible, caring man can be a challenge in today’s society. As parents we should teach our children how to get along with others, both inside their family and outside their family. One of the best ways to teach your son to be caring is to set a good example at home. If your son sees a good example at home, he is more than likely to grow up to be a respectable adult. You should emphasize the principles of responsibility, love, respect, learning, and positive attitudes.
Teaching your son to be caring will depend upon your example. You should always avoid arguments with your spouse or significant other in front of your children. It is known that no one is born with a violent personality; this is something they learn through intimidation. Aggressive words and actions lack love and respect in your home. You should not be surprised if your son is rude towards his siblings or classmates if you and your spouse have arguments in your home. If shouting, hitting, or violence occurs in your home, your son is being taught that this is acceptable behavior. Parents need to have calm discussions with each other behind closed doors and should always avoid aggressive behavior.
Teaching your son to be caring comes from the affection you give your son and to your spouse. Your son will look to you as his first views of affection. A son who is surrounded by parents who genuinely love each other and show their affection for each other will learn this behavior and carry it into adulthood. As a father, you should teach your son that it is ok to be tender and loving. Your son needs to hear from both his mother and father that he is loved. By giving you son proper affection, you are teaching him to have good self esteem and self worth.
Help your son express his feelings. Teach your son that it is ok to express their feelings and that they will not be judged by the feelings they express. Fear, sadness, and anger are all common emotions that boys experience and it is healthy for them to express what they are feeling. Teach your son that crying is ok for boys as well as girls and that being a “man” doesn’t mean you have to bottle your emotions and that you need to be aggressive when you are experiencing some of these emotions. By accepting your son’s emotions and allowing him to express them, you will help him become a caring man who will respect the feelings of both women and men.
Pay attention to the way your son interacts with his siblings and classmates. You do not want to support his actions if he is teasing or picking on others. Instead, talk to him about how he feels when others treat him that way and ask him why he feels he should treat others that way.
Teach your son to show tenderness, warmth, weakness and strength. By teaching him this, he will learn how to appropriately express his feelings and learn that it is not a bad quality to cry at certain times or hug his parents. As a parent, you should not feel hurt if he does not show you the same affection when he is in front of his classmates and friends. It is common for teenage boys to teach each other about certain things and you don’t want to add fuel to the fire by trying to give your fourteen year old son a hug or kiss on the cheek in front of his friends. This will actually cause him to be embarrassed and he may lash out in anger towards you.