How many times have you had a child walk out of their room, ready to go to school, or out with friends, and you were appalled by what they were wearing? The real question is, when is it worth fighting over it? The phrase, “choose your battles” is something most parents are intimately familiar with, and struggle with on a regular basis. The following is a look at when to fight over what your kids are wearing:
When it is immodest.
Many kids, girls especially, will wear clothing that is too tight, revealing, short, etc. in order to get attention, usually from boys. The problem is that this immodest clothing sends a message about what kind of girl they are. You do not see a girl with half of her breast exposed and has never kissed a boy. When your child wears something that is not modest, you need to ask them what they are trying to say about themselves with their clothing. People are often judged by what they wear, and immodest clothing typically sends the message of being “easy” or willing to go far sexually, etc.
Like it or not, clothes tell something about us.
When their clothing draws the wrong kind of attention.
Clothes say a lot about who you are, and can bring attention to your child. A rock star, for example, will often wear clothing with lots of bling and embellishments. So, when your child is wearing something outrageous, you need to determine the type of attention they will bring to themselves. A child wearing all black, and a long black trench coat after Columbine would be sending a very scary message, and get unwanted negative attention. But a girl wearing neon leggings under a flouncy skirt might just want her fun personality to get noticed. So, are their clothes getting positive or negative attention?
When it is inappropriate for the event or outing.
A prom dress is great for prom, but not a track meet. A pair of running shorts and a sports bra is great for working out, but not for going to school. Talk to your child about event appropriateness when it comes to their clothing. Help them choose clothes that properly reflect the event and are right for the situation. If they dress improperly for the event or outing, fight with them about it.
When it has foul language or crude pictures etc.
If what your child is wearing depicts something inappropriate like a naked girl, or says something inappropriate, like a foul word, then it is right to fight them on their choice of clothing. These not only send a message to those who see your child, but also expose other people to things they may or may not want to see. It is inappropriate in almost every venue, and thus should be avoided.